The Pen, Phone, and Titanium Head

Obama, sending the tax evading, race-baiting Reverend Al Sharpton to Ferguson as your emissary was like sending the Kardashian sisters as emissaries to meet with ISIS. The only thing to come out of that decision is more trouble. But as long as it does not interrupt your golf game, what do you really care? I mean, let’s be honest, in the name of peaceful race relations, as long as Soros, Gates, Rockefeller, Rothschild, et al are happy, you are happy. One day, the ruling elite will cut the puppet strings, but you’ve got several more years to putter around, what do you really care? Worse case scenario, send Michael in to pinch hit for you.

This Ferguson thing will blow over, just like everything else. Look at the Sandy Hook scandal, not a single actor harmed. Or Benghazi, they got all of the surface to air missiles to Syria, and only four white guys died. It was a major bummer about all those SEAL TEAM VI guys, you should have been more careful with that one. Packing them into a Vietnam era Chinook CH-47D was not a wise idea. If you are going to assassinate that many white guys, at least make it look like you do not have their blood on your hands. It’s okay, though, Michael Savage is the only one complaining and he’s just a loud mouth, white radio disc jockey, so you probably got away with that one, too, in the long run.

Of course, with Trey Gowdy after Hillary on that Benghazi thing, that honest, white guy might be a problem, but I am sure you have it all thought out. Maybe Ebola will work. You have been letting them flood through the Southern border like mice off a boat, just have one of them sit in on one of those closed-door interrogations. That will take care of all those pesky white folks and the Benghazi debacle, too. That only leaves the IRS scandal. Have your esteemed colleague, Eric Holder take the hit for that one, God knows he hasn’t done anything worthy of the position so far.

Trending: The Truth Is That John “Songbird” McCain Was A Traitor

That leaves the illegal immigration issue and how to declare martial law. Neither one is really a problem. These lazy, apathetic Americans haven’t done anything but wave signs at buses. They haven’t done anything when you dump the diseased brats in their states. They won’t do anything but run their fat mouths when their kids are sent home with lice, scabies, and drug-resistant leprosy. There will be some kind of protesting, but it’s nothing, normalcy bias. Once they accept the fact that they can’t change anything, they will settle back in their lazy boys, pop a Budweiser, and watch the latest reality show. Americans are funny like that. “It caint happen here”…”I got my 12 gauge if them Muzlems try anythang”…oh look, Survivor‘s on.

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Martial law, Obama, this one you can take on from the golf course! Between ISIS and Ebola, that one is a slam dun…er…hole in one.

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